David Toborowski on Hope, Haters, and Fatherhood at 58

Almost ten years after 90 Day Fiancé, David talks to Get Obsessed about the comment sections, IVF, and raising a daughter in Thailand.

By Conner Tighe

When David Toborowski first appeared on "90 Day Fiancé," he arrived in Thailand short on money for Annie's dowry, and the internet quickly made up its mind about him. Almost ten years later, he joined Julie Lokun and Mika Altidor on Get Obsessed from Thailand, where he and Annie now live with their young daughter. Annie couldn't make this one, but David had plenty to say about both of them.

Julie has watched the couple since day one. Mika, newer to the franchise, found the early episodes hard to sit through. Julie's answer to that: "That's not the story. The story is the ending."

A rough start

David is candid about how hard the beginning was. He'd spent almost five years teaching in Thailand and China, and coming back to the U.S. at 48 was tougher than he expected. Watching himself on screen didn't help. "Had they had Pillow Talk when I was first on, I would have been talking shit about myself as well."

What kept him going was Annie. "When the world was casting doubt, she was still laying in my arms every night saying, I want you to live forever." Early on, the two agreed they would "talk to each other, not through each other," and they still lean on it.

He also pushed back on the old green card theory. Moving to America was his idea, he said. Annie, now a U.S. citizen, chose to go back to Thailand.

Living with the comments

David doesn't pretend the criticism never stung, but he's made peace with it. "Did I learn some things from the comments? Sure," he said. "It helped me do some self-reflection and try to improve and make better decisions." He's realistic about the fan base too: "Without the fans, there is no show."

As for why he shared his life publicly at all, he pointed to men his age who struggled after divorce and the 2008 housing crash, some of whom didn't make it. "I wanted to share that journey that as long as you have breath, you have hope."

A baby nobody expected

Their daughter came through IVF, since David had a vasectomy in 2000. Denying Annie motherhood, he said, "would be the most selfish thing in the world." Asked whether this is a shot at redemption after being a less-present father to his older kids, he declined the word. "I just say I learned from the past and I'm trying to do more."

At 15 months, she's already in a preschool where she can learn Thai, English, Chinese and Russian. "I want her to be a global citizen," David said. "Borders don't define people." He posts constantly, partly so she'll always have a record of her childhood.

Life in Thailand

The rest of the conversation stayed light. Thirty eggs for about $3.50, $2 rides across town, and a personal rule David swears by: a foot massage for every 10,000 steps. Their biggest fights are over dinner, plus one Arizona mix-up when Annie asked to go to Goodwill, and he drove her to a scenic overlook instead.

David hinted that something new is in the works. "We're not done sharing our lives," he said. Get Obsessed already plans to have him back, with Annie this time.